On Nurturing Children

What saves and makes for good children is the life of the parents in the home. The parents need to devote themselves to the love of God. They need to become saints in their relations to their children through their mildness, patience, and love. They need to make a new start every day, with a fresh outlook, renewed enthusiasm and love for their children. And the joy that will come to them, the holiness that will visit them, will shower grace on their children. Generally the parents are to blame for the bad behavior of the children. And their behaviour is not improved by reprimands, disciplining, or strictness. If the parents do not pursue a life of holiness and if they don’t engage in spiritual struggle, they make great mistakes and transmit the faults they have within them. If the parents do not live a holy life and do not display love towards each other, the devil torments the parents with the reactions of the children. Love, harmony and understanding between parents are what are required for the children. This provides a great sense of security and certainty.

- Elder Porphyrios

The peaceful family life

To your question as to what constitutes happiness in life – whether it is grandeur, glory and wealth, or a quiet, peaceful family life, – I will tell you that I agree with the latter, and I will also add that a life spent with a pure conscience and with humility brings peace, tranquility, and true happiness, while wealth, honors, glory, and high position are often the cause of many sins and do not bring happiness.

- Elder Macarius of Optina

Miracles happen through the prayers of children

Miracles happen through the prayers of small children. Whatever they ask of God He gives them because they are guileless and He hears their pure prayer. I remember one time our parents had gone out into the field and had left me in the house with my two younger siblings. The sky suddenly darkened and a torrential rainstorm began. “What will our parents do now?,” we said. “How will they get back home?” The two little ones began crying. “Come here,” I told them, “we will ask Christ to stop the rain.” The three of us knelt down before the family’s icons and prayed. In just a few minutes the rain stopped.

- Elder Paisios of Mt. Athos

On Christian upbringing of children

For the correct, Christian upbringing of your children: few words, much example, and more prayer are necessary.

- Father Epiphanios Theodoropoulos, Counsels for Life

I ask of You God (a child’s wish)

From here on earth,
From my small place
I ask of You God
Please tell all men
In every land
What you and I
Both understand
Please tell all men
That Peace is Good.
That’s all
That need be understood.
In every world
In Your great sky,
We understand.
Both You and I.

Dedicated to all the children whose souls now rest in the arms of God.

Icon Family Tree (for families with children)

Firstly we print out the tree design and color it, then we trimm and add our icons of the Patron Saints for each member of the family. We cut the icons. An icon of Christ must be centered in the trunk of the tree. Then we can add the words of Christ - “I am the true vine + Ye are the branches” below. Then we put some glue and glitter, then we mount it on construction paper, with two holes and string at the top. It hangs as a sort of a tapestry in our home. If you’d like, you could also write at the top “God bless the _______ Family.”

Little ones to Him belong

Jesus loves me when I’m good,

When I do the things I should,

Jesus loves me when I’m bad,

Though it makes Him very sad.

Yes, Jesus loves me!

Yes, Jesus loves me!

Yes, Jesus loves me!

The Bible tells me so.

(Photo By Close to Home)

Little Boy’s Explanation of God — Fabulous!!

It was written by an 8-year-old named Danny Dutton, who lives in Chula Vista , CA . He wrote it for his third grade homework assignment, to ‘explain God.’ I wonder if any of us could have done as well?

EXPLANATION OF GOD:

‘One of God’s main jobs is making people. He makes them to replace the ones that die, so there will be enough people to take care of things on earth. He doesn’t make grownups, just babies. I think because they are smaller and easier to make. That way he doesn’t have to take up his valuable time teaching them to talk and walk. He can just leave that to mothers and fathers.’

‘God’s second most important job is listening to prayers. An awful lot of this…

Read More

Matthew 19:14

“God bless those who work against the exploitation of children - to whom the Kingdom of Heaven belongs.”

-St. Matthew 19:14

Helping Children When They Have “Trouble with God”

How can we help children who are having “trouble with God?”

Here are some ideas that will prove helpful in such situations.

Choose your words carefully. Don’t say, “God needed a good singer in heaven, so He took your grandmother because she had such a beautiful voice.” Rather, assure the child that he or she will see grandmother again in God’s Kingdom, so that he or she will not be led to believe that God is an enemy who takes away the people and things we love most. In the same vein, don’t tell a child that seeing grandma again will only happen “if you are good.” Offer reassurance.

Let grieving happen naturally. After major loss, children need time to grieve, and it’s better to be sympathetic than to try to “jolly them” out of sadness, or to encourage them to smile when they may not be ready to do so. Realize, too, that a child may need to revisit and retell the sad event. Talking about it a single time might not be enough.

Share some of your own experiences of having “trouble with God.” Knowing that you pray and have faith when you have doubted or felt unsure of God’s presence will help children to do likewise.

Prayer. Encourage troubled children to pray during the day. Basic to our Tradition is “Lord, have mercy.” Assure them that you are praying for them. If possible, get in touch with them during the week to remind them that you are praying, and that you hope they are praying, too.

Be approachable. Let children know that you won’t be shocked or turned off by anything they want to tell you. The teacher of the seven-year-old who was having trouble with God was like this. As a result, the teacher was able to give comfort and to say that we can trust God even when we don’t understand things. The adult’s willingness to listen was a model of God’s care and trust for that student.

“Listen and repeat!” Tell children over and over again that God loves them, no matter what. We will never “get” everything that happens in life – as children or as adults – but He knows everything and is always working for our good. That is His promise, and it is our sure hope.

Some excerpts from Valerie G. Zahirsky’s useful article

Don’t feel sad!

“Parents who have retarded children, must not feel sad for them, because their souls are already saved.  On the contrary, they must be happy, because their children, without making any efforts, have earned paradise.  What else can parents wish for their children?  If they face their child’s defect in a spiritual way, they are also benefited and rewarded by God.”

-Elder Paisios

The life of the parents

The life of the parents is the only thing that makes good children. Parents should be very patient and ‘saint’ to their children. They should truly love their children. And the children will share this love! For the bad attitude of the children, says father Porphyrios, the ones who are usually responsible for it are their parents themselves. The parents don’t help their children by lecturing them and repeating to them ‘advices’, or by making them obeying strict rules in order to impose discipline. If the parents do not become ‘saints’ and truly love their children and if they don’t struggle for it, then they make a huge mistake. With their wrong and/or negative attitude the parents convey to their children their negative feelings. Then their children become reactive and insecure not only to their home, but to the society as well…

-Elder Porphyrios

Teaching the Holy Trinity to children

An image that can be used with kids in teaching the Trinity is an ice cube in a pan of boiling water. The ice is solid, the water is liquid and the steam is gas but they are all H2O. All three things are separate, but they are all the same thing and all at the same time in the same place. For very young children, this is a concept they can grasp easily, and although it is simplistic, it is sufficient for them.

Saint Macarius said…

“In preparing your children for life in the world, have you taken care to plant in their hearts faith and fear of God, which will be their guides in the future? Pray to teh Lord that He protect their hearts from the tares which are sown among the wheat by the enemy.”

– St. Macarius

What is the Primary goal in the education of children?

“The Primary goal in the education of children is to teach, and to give example of, a virtuous life.”

- St. John Chrysostom